Waking up each morning is like Christmas, I turn my head and look at a smiling little chubby face who breaks out in a giggle when I catch him staring at me, he loves being caught in the act. Each day I watch with anticipation on what Daltons going to do today as everyday he does something new. The other day I was sitting with him on my lap singing "Dalton works out..look at that body!", yes that is what I was singing, no twinkle twinkle little star here, and he looked at me with one of those radiant smiles then broke out in a giggle, I don't know who was more startled me or him!

Another thing I am learning is that there is no book that teaches you how to be a perfect parent, you have to parent from the heart. I was so determined to start Dalton on a routine, the night finally came where he would get to eat (more like suck on) rice cereal, and this was the night he would start his schedule! Boy was I wrong. I had planned on bathing him, then putting him in his big boy highchair and feeding him with his big boy spoon as he graciously chewed up his cereal and smiled the whole time, then we would go in his nursery and rock him to sleep as we listened to "Disney Love Songs" on his little boom box his Daddy just bought him, then I would lovingly carry him to his bassinet in my room and put him to sleep. Did I mention how wrong I was??

So after a nice clean bath its time to feed him, I realize what a mistake this is as I have it a bit backwards, definitely should bathe AFTER we feed him! After putting him in his highchair and starting the rice cereal (Iv been so excited all day about this!) he spits it out at me, knocks the spoon out of my hands, grabs the little bowl and slings it out of my hands and then proceeds to rub it all over his face. After our food fight I decide its best to just start from scratch and do another bath, so far my schedule is not working out... after a nice clean outfit we go to his rocking chair..and after about ten minutes to my astonishment he is out like a light... so now for the big transfer as I hold my breath! As soon as I lay him down both his eyes pop open and he looks at me with accusation in his eyes as to say "how could you" and then the crying starts.... and it is quite loud. Everyone tells you, google included, to let them cry it out they will eventually fall asleep, this is much easier said then done. After about ten minutes I couldn't take it any longer and went and scooped up my Munchkin Head and felt about as tall as a pile of.. you get the drift.. and  Irocked him and loved on him as he cried in my arms wondering how I could leave him alone in a room crying.. yes I still feel guilty, can you tell?

So, there is no book on how to be the perfect parent. I am learning you do what your heart tells you to do, and if this makes me an imperfect mother so be it, I don't want to be perfect if that is the case. I would rather be the kind of mother that my mother was, I would rather be a bit unconventional and raise a child who adores me as I adore my mother but also has great respect for. I hope to be the kind of parent that Dalton is proud of and that in twenty years I look back and say " I may not have done everything right, but I did it my way, I can look back and feel no guilt at how I raised him and be proud at the young man he turned out to be"... in conclusion I hope to be like my mother, that would be the greatest accomplishment of all.